December 11, 2020
Earlier this month, I was visiting my friends in Minnesota, and had to take one of my finals. Due to the wifi problems they had in their house, and all coffee shops in Minnesota shut down, we had to search for one that was open in a small town in Wisconsin so that I could take my final. In a hurry to begin, I went inside before my two friends, and sat in a chair. While I was getting my stuff ready, an old man came and sat down beside me. He started to talk to me, and tell me how he was a neurological doctor. Our conversation turned into a one and a half hour discussion on where real happiness comes from and what it means to love. The man, trying to convince me that he was, word for word, “all knowing”, said to me: “When God created the world, he messed up one thing.” When I asked what he thought God messed up, he answered, “He didn’t put enough love in the world.” But who are we to tell God where he messed up in creating the world? As if we, with our human brains, know better than God himself. I began to explain how God did not mess anything up. He did not fill the world with too little love. Rather, he gave us each a choice to love, and it is our job to put love where it needs to be put. God gave us each the capability to love, and he left the duty up to us to decide and to act upon it. It’s not that God didn’t put enough love in the world, it’s that we don’t love enough. God put enough capability in every one of us to love, but so many of us choose not to. So many of us destroy love… misuse the term… and twist what it is… creating a different reality to what it means to love. But how do you convince someone of this who tells you time and time again that they have learned everything there is to know and are all knowing? I never thought I would meet someone who truly believed that they were done learning. The man continued to tell me that “Because I am all knowing, and you are not, I have to bring my knowledge level down to yours. Because you simply don’t know anything of what it means to love or what happiness is.”
When I asked the man if he ever prays, he said “God talks to me, but I don’t talk to God.” I asked him why and he said “Because I don’t need to! Why would God want to talk to me?” “Well, if you were a father of a son, and even though you knew what was best for your son, wouldn’t you want your son to still talk to you?” I asked him. “It doesn’t work that way.” He discarded what I said. When I explained what love was, he continued to discard everything I said saying, “Love does not require sacrifice or giving to others. It has nothing to do with happiness either.”
In fact, just a few weeks before, I had been reflecting on what it means to love. To have such a strong desire for what God has in store for you that your heart and soul thirst for it; so much that it burns. What I pondered was this:
Let your soul burn for Him. Have such a passionate desire for union and intimacy with the Lord that you run to him. He was all of the answers- the ones you’ve spent hours, days, and years searching for. Search for Him in everyone, and in every moment; especially where you least expect to find him. Those who treat you the worst desperately need Christ more than ever. Be Christ to them. Perhaps you are the only encounter they’ve ever had with the face of Christ. Maybe you are that small moment they have been waiting for. A journey well spent is one that has risks; one that is conquered with a courageous heart that has “put on the armor of God.” Nothing can defeat us when we allow ourselves to stand beside God and let Him do His work through us. Being a warrior means having a battle to fight, and a love to fight for- and it is a difficult task, which is why we must stand firm. Seek the highest end in which you can love now to the smallest present moment. Desire it and consent to it. Love is a constant choice. The more we know Christ, who is the source of love, and love in it’s highest form, since He is all love, the more we are capable of loving those around us. How can we know how to love if we hardly witness it? We must be that whiteness of love to those who have not witnessed the face of Christ. Our culture twists “love” into a sensation of making ourselves feel good, even if it’s at the cost of another’s soul. But to really Love is to empty ourselves; to give of ourselves; to sacrifice for others… Which is why Christ’s death on the cross is the greatest act of love. He loves us perfectly. How blessed and lucky we are to know that we are loved so perfectly… yet so many do not know or understand. The harder it is to love, the more ability we have to choose to love; and the more love we are able to offer. When we choose to love when it’s hardest, that is when we truly allow the Lord to work through us; because it is so much easier to choose hate. To love is an act, not a feeling. However, good feelings can follow after performing an act of love. But feelings cannot stand alone as a definition of love. To love is a choice, not an occurrence. It is a constant choice and action to be done. One cannot love without sacrifice; for sacrifice is a requirement of love. Whenever you encounter or speak to a person, it is a loving opportunity. A chance to recognize the dignity and beauty of their soul- whether that be directly or indirectly. The more we love a person, the more we see them how God sees them.
Only by giving of yourself will you be at peace. Only by loving and being selfless. We all want peace. No one wants stress, worry, and anxiety in their life. Humility is key. You must be at peace with yourself in order to maintain peace with others. Love is an act of the will. Do you will to love? Who do you will to love? Are you taking some people off that list? And if so, why? Reflect daily on how well you loved. We must be joyful in living. Suffer with others, because you will grow in love through doing so. The more you love, the more you understand what it means to love. The more you understand what it means to love, the more capability you have to love on a much deeper level. We learn to love by choosing to do so. It’s a daily choice, moment to moment, and sometimes will require incredible strength to do so. Put love where it is meant to be put, and be an example of love to those who have not witnessed enough of it.