The Ability to Love

March 2, 2020

Love is a strange thing. It is something that can be said or done or felt or lived; given, taken, shared or broken. But one thing about love is that it is a strength. It is a strength to be able to love. An ability. A duty. But to choose to love freely is one of the most beautiful ways of all. Knowing that the person you love most will still fail you. And that’s okay. Failing, suffering, getting wounded… it is all part of humanity. But humans also have the strength to get up. And through loving, have the ability to forgive. The power to be resilient. Just because you may have messed up a few times in life does not make you a messed up person… it makes you human. One who makes mistakes is human. But the one who chooses to rise up from it and conquer is a Fighter and a strong person who knows how to love and how to forgive. When the person you love fails you, and you choose still to love them… that, my friend, is choosing to love freely. I will fail you. But I hope that even then, you still love me.

How does God reveal himself through the love of another? Through my lover? Dearest lover… Out of all the people on this earth, God chose you to be my lover. He knew that of all the people on this earth, our love for one another would be the most beneficial. He chose you so that he could reveal himself to me through you. He chose to love me through you. He desired to reveal his love for me through the love that you have for me. So that when I marvel at the great amounts of love you have for me, I stand in awe at the endless amounts of love my father must have for me. My dearest lover, I know that my worth and my identity is not found in your love for me, but in the love that God has for me because I am made in his image. But I do know that you deeply love the identity and the worth that I possess… and you value it… and you love me for it. And with that, you help me see my identity that is given to me by God. You inspire me to grow, and challenge me to make something better of myself; for God, and for you. Because if I love you, you deserve only the best. So I must seek to be the best that I can be for you. It will require constant prayer and constant striving, but If I am who God wants me to be… who he has made me to be… then that is when I can be the best that I can be for you.

Becoming this “best version” is not easy at all. If it were, we would live in a world of perfect people and perfect things. There would be no need for suffering; there would be no opportunities to love when it is hardest. There would hardly even be a need for living on earth. We are given life on earth and time to live to transform ourselves into something better. Life is a constant test for an eternal reward. Becoming someone better usually comes through some form of suffering, or some form of giving; stepping out of ourselves. Working up to a higher level always requires climbing. It always requires strength, and is often difficult. But every step is worth it. Even the small, seemingly meaningless ones. But each step takes us somewhere… So where are you looking? Because that is the direction that you will head. Each step we make is making something of ourselves; and one way or the other, we are constantly being transformed.

You see, we are called to be Christ bearers. To bear an image of God. We cannot love if we do not know love himself. But when we receive God’s love into our hearts, we carry it where we go. My dear lover, you have witnessed God. You have understood his love. That is why you love so well. That is why God chose you to be my lover. The love of a woman is different than the love of a man. The love of a woman is inviting; it is nurturing and it is captivating. She bears inside of her a dignity worth pursuing, and a heart worth understanding. A love of a man reflects the love of the father. It is protecting. It is strong. It is gentle and it is tender. When the woman dwells in his presence, she is not afraid. She feels protected. She feels safe. She knows that he is watching out for her. She is pursued by him. She knows that when he is by her side, no one can do her harm. She sees the way he looks at her, almost with a sense of awe, and it speaks thousands of words. My lover is patient, my lover is kind. He does not envy, he does not boast, he is not proud. My lover does not dishonor others, he is not self-seeking, he is not easily angered, he keeps no record of wrongs. My lover does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. He always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.